Thursday, August 20, 2009

gara2 anwar,aku teraddicted lak..haha..layankan~ lagu baru besh ni.

Lirik Hujan – Mencari Konklusi

Belum tersimpul mati
Ikatan itu ku buka sendiri
Terus bertempiaran
Cinta huraian
Ku takkan mengerti

Teka silangkata
Membuat parah menambah persoalannya
Aku tak pasti yang kita hadapi
Yang kita semua cari

Coba tenang seketika
Coba pejam mata
Biar resah hilang saja

Dan coba diamnya bicara
Sediam bersama
Di temani jasad kita

Kan ku cari konklusi

The Girl In The Mirror

have you ever took a moment,even a brief one,to stand before a mirror and stare into your own eyes?i've done it,numerous times.i tell myself loads of things.most of the time i tell myself:

You are an outgoing person. You have a quirky personality. You love being the center of attention and shine your brightest when you're in the spotlight. You're an independent individual, able to hold your own ground. You're steadfast in the things you believe, but remember to keep an open mind. You're a leader in your group of friends and people often look towards you for guidance.

ok maybe not,stole that form an fb quiz,lol.but what i'm trying to point out here is about how i view myself as,without considering how others do.i view myself as an individual,who likes to put a smile on everyone's faces eventhough it means sacrificing my own happiness.i try hard,really hard,to satisfy everyone.but,being a mortal human always hinders my efforts.i have a destination,i already am in the middle of the journey,yet i make mistakes along the way.being a human,once again,makes having problems inevitable in life.

also,being a human,i can't always be the one who takes the blame.yes,i want everyone to be happy,but in life,we have to be selfish when it comes to personal rights.say,there's this's not even clear nor proven that you are 100% to be blamed,but in the end,you are.the other party wants you to admit it,eventhough there are no evidence at's a partial decision,and i know it's unfair.true,i admit that i am the kind of person who hates to lose,but in this case,can you see where this situation might take me to if i forfeit the game and just take the blame?further depression,that's where.people can talk,and speculate,say whatever they want.yes i do write crap,as if anyone gives a damn.

*sigh*'s my fault,if that makes you happy i'll admit's always been me're always right and i'm always wrong.i'm never right,period.i'm just a 16-year-old good-for-nothing bitch.i don't even know why you guys are even reading's all a lie,it's all false and you're wasting approximately 10minutes of your lives to go through this emotional post.i feel hopeless now,so i think i should stop now.

and seeing the rest of the competitors are not helping as well.they are far better than me.Japan trip seems far-fetched now,and my life will get more miserable as the day goes,to-morrow and to-morrow..what gives me hope is the knowledge that it's gonna be another day,if i'm still alive.

looking for a 'pause' button