Porque Te Quiero

it was a normal night,when everyone would do nothing but just talk crap.i felt a sense of sudden emptiness.it was as though i was sitting in a crowded room,surrounded by everyone i know and love,but inside..i'm empty.i laugh,i smile,i'm amused by them all but there was a tiny hollow space in my heart,which i do not know of its origins.then all out of a sudden... you appeared.

you stood out form the crowd.i did nothing but stare at you.waiting..and waiting..while all my friends got extremely excited.they started posting messages of encouragement,pushing me to say hi to him.pushing me to make a move.pushing me to not let him be alone.i was shy,i don't know why.it seemed better to talk to him without all these people around,no offence.i wrote a few posts to counter my friends.somehow...maybe he understood.he said hi to me and i was so delighted.but... he was different.he was less cheerful,not as joyful as he is during our thursday rendezvous.he told me how he's having sleepless nights.he told me about the emptiness he feels.he was getting a bit too personal at some points,so much so that i felt that he's trying to tell me something.at the same time,my friends were endlessly picking on me,asking me to not let this opportunity fade away.i thought it would've been selfish of me to take advantage,i knew he was somewhat down and needed someone to talk to.so i let my selfish needs go and decided to listen to him.i tried to help him,but i know my effort was to no avail.i diverted his attention instead,and talked about something happier.our conversation lasted for quite some time,despite the unfavourable internet connection.the IM window wasn't acting up,it was miraculous.our conversation broke off in the end when the both of us got sleepy.did i just talk him to sleep?am i really that boring? LOL.but it's good to know that he's alright after all.

what puzzles me the most is the fact that he still doesn't realize my feelings for him?or has he,pretending not to?so many uncertainties.jasper even complained that he was partly being ignored by 'him',assuming that 'he' was too busy talking to me.LOL! seriously,everyone mad eme blush today.in a way,Nizar is right.sooner or later,the truth will have to prevail.whether i like it or not.

let's just see what happens.one thing's for sure,i love him. :)

17 again?

i had this very theatrical dream when i was having my usual power nap this evening.it must have been all the blogging,Enrique Iglesias frenzy and whatnot.i knew nothing good would come out of it,LOL! nevertheless,i really loved my dream,even though it's nothing but surreal and a bit too .... forward-thinking.i dreamed that i was at the park in my condo,riding the swing,alone,with my mp3 playing Enrique's duet with Nadiya entitled 'Miss You'.all out of a sudden,the swing stopped abruptly,it was as if someone took hold of both the support rope to purposely pause its motion.i got pissed,it's common for me to feel that way considering how my temper can be a bit variable at times.as i looked up,a familiar face smiled upon me.my heart pounded so hard,i think it might have popped out of my chest for all i care.YOU! wtf are you doing in my dream?before i was able to do anything,he stared into my eyes and gave me a gentle peck on my lips.OMG! is this how a first kiss feels like?i pushed him away out of shock and ran,but then he pulled my hand and whispered to explain everything.i eventually rushed upstairs and looked in the mirror..

oh my...WHAT HAPPENED TO MY FACE!! WHAT YEAR IS IT?? i checked my phone,only to find that it was already 2021,which means..i'm 28 years old?and married?? i turned behind,he was at the door,curious to know whether or not it was ok for him to come in already.i let him in of course,but still,i was in the state of disbelieve.i'm married to him?and the funniest thing is,i don't look much different from how i looked when i was 17.he sat down with me on my bed and told me how i got into an accident and went through amnesia for months.it was really awkward.when he was done with his side of the tale,i wanted to ask him whom he was,but before i could,i felt my shoulders being shook several times.

.........my mom woke me up from the dream.i ran into the bathroom to look at my reflection.i was really grateful that i was 17 again,LMAOOO...i AM 17,never was 28 anyway.not ready to be,as a matter of fact.the dream was really sweet nevertheless.

...to this hour,i'm still wondering who was that guy in my dream?he looked familiar...but i don't know.let's just see for ourselves..