No Reservations

" Kate: What are we going to do about work?
Nick: What we always do. You tell me what to do and then I'll go behind your back and do whatever I want. "

-No Reservations (2007)

don't you think that's our situation,Marco?i watched this movie last night after flickering through the shows on Asian Food Channel.it's a movie about this obsessive chef,Kate.she's been nothing but a control queen when it comes to her kitchen and her life but everything changes when she met an italian chef,Nick.

this situation pretty much resembles my life before and after i met Marco.i used to be such a control freak,taking control of EVERYTHING.i'm mean,i'm scary,i'm despicable,i'm a little heartless but when i met him,a lot of things changed.there goes all my punk rocker traits since he stole my heart away.i became more well-behaved and more feminine in a way.why?because he seems to be the only guy who treats me like a lady,aside from my non-schoolmates of course.it's very rare to find gentlemen like him these days,maybe that's why i fell for him.the thing about him is that,he's unpredictable.he's always a little too humble and a little too introvert when it comes to others but when he's around me,he becomes an extrovert and couldn't stop talking.he's shy at times when i'm with my friends but when i'm alone,that's when he will approach me.another peculiar thing about him is that he's always acting as if i'm better than him in everything,that sucks.and that mysterious stare he had on me whenever we bump into each other.

and today,i thought i was totally over you but clearly i wasn't.i passed by the places we used to walk together.i saw the basketball court where we used to play basketball in one team,and won over our opponents.and what i remembered the most is when i was too busy doing my own work in the lab,you stood in front of me and waited eagerly for me to say hi to you.when i did,you smiled.it was then when i realise how special you are and how much you're suppose to mean to me.

when you passed by my class today,again and again,have you ever wondered why i shyly looked away?

my heart knows no reservations anymore.it's an empty space,waiting for the right person to fill it up with a garden sprouting with love and tender joy with a tinge of empathy here and there.you seem to have built a cottage in my mind,will you please be the one i'm looking for?

Wish I Could Save You

"Sometimes i wish i could save you,

And there's so many things that I want you to know,

I won't give up till it's over,

If it takes you forever,I want you to know...."

yesterday when i came to school,i had to rush everything.i threw my bags on the floor behind the open hall and ran to the backstage to prepare for the English Day performance alongside the rest of the Activians.nabeel had the keyboard set up and hazem had gotten the P.A System ready for us,now what's left to be done is only to go up the stage and try our very best not to screw up and end up making fools out of ourselves,again.LOL.we went up,aisyah made a little intro speech and the performance began.i don't know why,this song had gotten into me right to this day.when SImple Plan wrote it,it was dedicated to cancer patients all over the globe,and it reminded me a lot of my dad.the emotions got hold of me and before i knew it,it had a firm grip on my voice too.all my shyness faded away and i was singing my heart out to the song.needless to say my singing is a little off,despite what yana said:

okay so we talked about spain,and then she diverted the topic to the English Day performance.but anyhow,i enjoyed it,seriously.i didn't really consider it as a cheap publicity or another utter embarrassment of ourselves,instead,i considered it as an honor to be able to perform one last time.

i guess the song meant a lot to me,and having my friends along on stage makes it even more meaningful.

p/s: i still love you,marco.